what nightmare is this?

The only thing I have to say is that tonight I have to go see my "small school" students put on a play. Last time I did this it was fifty children wearing paper bunny ears, shouting incomprehensible Chinglish and bouncing around to pulsating make-out house music. I keep a small bottle of Johnny Walker Black in my manpurse for just such occasions. I might have to lose some face and hit the sauce in public tonight.